In the 1940’s life was simple. Families engaged with one another. Boys still climbed outside and threw a baseball around with the neighborhood kids. People sat together at the family dinner table and talked about their day, their thoughts, their concerns, their triumphs.

In today’s world, it is far more likely that the children will be playing online multiplayer games, while Dad is checking Facebook and Mom is tweeting about her day.

The Top Toys for Christmas 2011 are nearly all electronic. Last year’s Christmas season was overwhelming Internet obsessed. What happened to good old family nights? Popcorn balls and games of “Sorry”?

The closest we can hope for these days is the Lego Hogwarts board game.

Between Facebook, Twitter, Flicker, YouTube, email, and Skype, people spend hours of each day online communicating. Are we really communicating though?

Why are choosing to engage in such virtual forms rather than in person? In reality, are we losing the ability to simply have a conversation, a connection, in person?

Internet Addiction?

The debate continues about whether or not our infatuation with the Internet is truly leading to a nation of hermits. While some studies disagree with this theory, others support it vehemently.

In 1998, the Carnegie Mellon University found that high Internet usage was directly linked to higher levels of depression, fewer friends, and high levels of stress.

Several studies in the 1990’s suggested an “Internet Addiction” epidemic. While this term isn’t used often today, in the 1990’s it was a major concern. Symptoms include but are not limited to: using online services daily, going out less, losing track of time, relationships being affected, and obsessive email usage.

It’s frightening that today nearly all of us could easily fit such criteria and diagnosed with “Internet Addiction”.

It is remarkable that such addiction claims were being pondered long before any of our social networking sites had ever been thought of, let alone utilized. I wonder what those studies would have looked like had they been completed 10 years later or with the inclusion of supposed social giants as Facebook?

Why did clinicians coin the term Internet Addiction to begin with?

Quite simply, this addiction had the same social repercussions as did alcoholism, drug use or gambling. Effects such as paranoia, lying, secretive behavior, and negative effects within relationships, marriages, careers and health exist in any addiction. Quality of life is compromised for both the addict as well as his/her loved ones.

Sadly, the internet has led to such negative outcomes for many of us.

• Internet addiction deniers claim that the Internet is all about communicating with people throughout the entire world.  Is it? Yes. However, online communication does not compare to face-to-face interaction. Face-to-face communication adds tone, inflection, attitude, body language, and facial expression. The communication experience is fuller, more telling and far richer. We as humans are social beings. We need one another. We need human interaction. Spending time with people is not only healthy, but some claim therapeutic.

• Internet Addiction deniers claim that the Internet in fact supports maintaining relationships. However, critics have suggested that online friendships are superficial and lacking. By drowning ourselves in a virtual reality, we are losing daily life experiences, interactions, and face-to-face meetings and are instead settling for screen life.

Our Youth and the Internet

Critics, teachers and parents alike have all worried over Internet usage and our youth. With youth today often spending hours online, some have suggested that social skills simply can’t develop. The Internet is especially appealing for youth who are lacking in self-confidence or experience a difficult time in social settings. These children and teenagers will find the Internet much easier to navigate.

At what cost? Such youth may never develop fully and are instead go down a road of social isolation.

Control Freaks? Perhaps.

The Internet offers complete and total control. We able to control if, when, how, where, and to whom we communicate with. Although it’s easy to see the benefits of such control, there is a downside as well.

Lack of quality and lack of meaning or substance exists in these virtual friendships. Furthermore, social anxiety is generally linked to control issues.

As the Internet offers complete control, users are not encouraged to move past or work through their anxiety issues. On the contrary, each day continues to establish and reinforce that issue.

The last call to the Internet is sadly simple laziness. How many times has each of us lost track of time online? Procrastinated by using the computer as our tool? Or worse yet, decided to decline going out with friends to instead surf the net?

Regardless of how anyone feels over the validity of Internet Addiction, no one can deny that the Internet can be a huge time-waster. All the precious hours we spend each week, each month, could in fact be spent with our families, friends or community groups.

Praise for the Diverse Internet

In order to be fair, one must give the Internet praise when praise is clearly needed. While face-to-face interaction is valuable, it is also limiting to our own geographic area.

The Internet knows no bounds. Instead, Internet users generally have social groups much more diverse than those who are without. The Internet invites friendships with people throughout the world of various religions, races, economic backgrounds, ethnicities and cultures.

This diverse, virtual social group is not only thrilling, but indispensable. Friendships from such diverse backgrounds expand our horizons and well as offer us new perspectives on our own troubles. We are exposed to the experiences of others we would never have access to otherwise.

How to Address the Issue

How do we deal with Internet addiction?

It’s clear that there are some advantages, but the disadvantages for the Internet addict are noteworthy as well.

Like most things in this world, moderation is the key. It is best to limit computer time. Decide how much time you want to allow yourself each day, each week and stick to it.

List out all the things you used to do before you became an Internet hermit. This may be a serious wake up call, but also could lead to a happy reunion with some of your past interests!

Another idea is to create a behavioral treatment plan. Decide exactly how much time you want to dedicate to each online activity. When your time runs out, shut off the computer. Walk away. Try having a computer free day each week.

Also, consider becoming more active. Instead of chatting on Facebook, take a friend out to coffee. Try to get together with family more. Look into community activities and groups that interest you.Rather than being a hermit, you are not only being social but have the opportunity to meet even more people.

While some have turned our technology into godlike machines, others have vehemently ridiculed and fought against this change. The truth is the Internet is neither evil nor good. It can not change us into something we are not, or that we do not allow it to. It does however offer an avenue – one that like so many, is truly a mixed blessing.