I love when I come to my blog and the quote of the day at the top is appropriate for the day. For example, today's quote was from Babe Ruth who said,
"Don't let the fear of striking out hold you back."
This is a great way to say, Take a Risk, Get out There and Live. At least that is my interpretation. He could have just been talking about baseball, but I like the symbolism to real life. I know people that live life comfortably and safely, but completely unadventurous. In some ways, I have no fear of risk.
I have taken some risks in my life, not physical really because I am a big baby when it comes to risking injury. I like my bones and joints too much and I hate pain. I digress. But, risks mentally and financially.
I volunteered to go to Iraq, spent 6 months there, then got out of the Air Force without a full-time job line up, traveled solo to Europe for 10 weeks, and moved to a new city, bought a house, and went back to school full-time. This was all in the last two years. Whew. Risky? Maybe. But, I do not regret any of it. I love where I am at in life.
Oh, yeah. Did I mention the writing professionally thing? You knew that. You can see links to my other writings on the right side of this website.
Of course, I also have a big fear of striking out, especially in the romance department. Some people call it a commitment phobia. Could be.
I can't commit to what to eat for dinner, or paint colors, much less anything as serious as a relationship. It took me several months, and three contracts to decide on my house. I have four Master's degrees started (none finished) and took a trip to five stores to pick out blinds for my bedroom (that no one ever sees anyhow). Ahh, maybe it is fear of commitment, or maybe I am just indecisive.
My heart, well that is a different story. I am a lot more guarded there. I think to the point that I over-analyze, nit-pick, and am critical, which pushes people away, just to protect myself. This is all sub-conscious. Did I mention that this neurosis fades once I trust the person? HA. The thing is I never really get to that point. Oh, and I always pick the guys that are unavailable on some level-physically or emotionally. Again, sub-conscious. Isn't that crazy behavior from such a level-headed optimistic person?
Well, I can't do that anymore. I need to let people in a little bit more and not be so worried about getting hurt or striking out. Thinking that way only leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy. But, doing that, well that is risky. Terrifying to me, but necessary.
So, I did recently take a risk with my heart and I did strike out. I won't go into details here, but sometimes you have to find away to keep trying and not let it get you down. You have to get back on the horse and move forward. Sometimes, you will strike out and sometimes you will have amazing results.
It is life and it is living.
P.S. Yes, I have a degree in Psychology. It is going to be the death of me.
